Building the sheds foundations
The Foundations of friendship
Today I spent sweating like a whores leg.
Matt Robinson and Andy Haywood were my assistants. Matt being the great dude that he is turned up early and was ready to rock and roll when the concrete was delivered at 11am. I had ordered (PreMix) as I couldn’t be arsed mixing it myself, besides the premix cost the same as renting a mixer and all the other pish I would have needed to get.
Andy was expected to be there but didn’t show up, I was pretty pissed to say the least as that left only myself and matt to barrow the concrete round to the back of the house to where the foundations were being laid. the concrete arrived a little late, at 11:15am. Matt and I were barrowing it to the back when a TAXI rocked up at the front of the house and who should pop, sorry Fall out, but Mr Andrew Haywood our wayward assistant.
The arrival of Mr Haywood
To give the old fellow his dues he came right up to me and said “how’s it going?” the look on my face must have said it all, He immediately grabbed the barrow from my hands and off he went round the back of the house with a barrow full of very HEAVY concrete. Much to my delight he had taken the LARGE barrow which left me with the small one, he he, not that I let on.
The Drop off
We ferried the shit to the back of the house over the course of about 40min, 20 or so barrows of 25mpa concrete. Matt barely even broke a sweat, this you will understand by looking at his photo as he’s built like an action man, actually he looks a little like him too, without the (eagle eyes) peep through the back of the head thing…. OH and he has genitalia as he has procreated a wee baby named Harley. Andy almost toppled over a few times as he was very weak due to a FUCK OFF hangover that was knocking on his door, he conceeded to ferry barrows to the back and let Matt do the dumping, which in hindsight I probably should have done too.
Screeding
Once all the concrete was in place we had to move it about with spades and try to get it level. Once it was level we had to screed it, this involves agitating the wet concrete with a bit bit of timber so that the heavy parts sink and the wet smooth stuff floats to te surafce allowing for a nice smooth finish.
During this very hard work i could see that Andy by this point was toiling a little, there was a strange smell in the air of sweet, stinky sweaty feet,
“who’s feet can i smell” I asked
“I think it’s vomit” said Matt
“that’s me” said andy
apparently he had vomited no less than 1 hour prior to meeting us and moving all this concrete, some of which had apparently adhered itself to his skin, clothes, sweat and a large portion of the air surrounding his body which by now was penetrating my personal space.
The Aftermath
After we had completed the job I cracked out the beers, Matt joined me for a cold one but surprisingly Andy declined, instead opting to curl up beneith a tree and turn a very pale shade of grey.
After some time he seemed to pick up a bit, he headed for the BBQ and cooked us steak sandwiches. What a dude eh!. Dying with a hangover from hell but still musters up the energy to cook the boys some lunch.
ROCK AND ROLL ANDY!!! YOUR A DIAMOND.